It was the first "first date" physically located in Canberra since being back (12 months) so to say I was nervous was an understatement.
First dates are often like job interviews. You pass the first interview and proceed to the second which can sometimes be followed by aptitude and psychology testing and then hopefully you receive a job offer.
The same with a first date, if you were successful you then get to go on a second and hopefully a third date and over a period of time you maybe find yourself in some form of relationship.
Well this first date started off with me standing outside venue trying to casually look through the glass window to see if my intended date was inside as they had just sent a text 5 minutes before hand saying they were early and waiting. After a quick check of the predetermined venue on my phone I started to send a text to ask if venue "ABC" was correct only to be warmly greeted by my date.
What followed next was nothing adverse but also nothing exceptional. There was strained conversation about ones day, the weather, what did you do last weekend, what are your plans for the upcoming weekend followed by questions about "do you meet many guys locally?".
To be honest this job interview (sorry, date) was not going anywhere and we were only about 15 minutes into it. There seemed to be not much in common and no desire on either party thinking this would be a great place to work (sorry, date each other).
This is not a problem. Some people you connect with and others you don't. Just like in an interview you "get a feel" for if this place is one you can see yourself working for or not.
The sad part is that dating all seems so hard. I have been back in Canberra for over 12 months now and there has only been two first dates. The first was out of Canberra and this was the first within Canberra.
Online dating seems to be where it is at. There are sites that are designed are for genuine dating, whilst there are others for intimate meets. Some of these are computer based, others are phone apps. However the questions all seem to be the same;
- What department do you work for?
- What level are you?
- Where do you live?
- What is your favourite bar?
- Do you drive?- this one always surprises me as not many gay guys seem to have a car
- Which gym do you go to?
- Do you live alone?
- Can you host? - think about it
- Can I come over now?
- Will you drive and pick me up?
There are a couple more but if you are smart you can probably guess "those ones"! You feel like that you are shopping for some piece of clothing on line or you are a "snazzy" blazer waiting to be purchased.
I am pretty sure that this is not restricted to the "gay scene" and probably crosses all genders and orientations.
However like finding the right job at the right time in your life - something always seems to come to you from "left field" and you just know at this point in time this is what you are looking for.
So to my two first dates within the last 12 months, thank you for being genuine in meeting and gracious in not being rude if we are not the right match for each other.
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